Who am I? (Vision Seeker Day 2)

29 April 2017

Having previously enjoyed Nicole Piar's (free) Vision Seeker ecourse*, I decided to re-do some of the exercises, starting with Day 2 - Tuning in to Yourself. Following Nicole's guided meditation, I asked what aspects of myself want to come forward and what element(s) are seeking expression. The first and last card made me chuckle - they are exactly what I expected to see in response to these questions - but the second was more of a 'surprise', by which I mean something I wasn't quite ready to own up to. Let's take a look at each card in turn.  
Deck: The Good Tarot by Colette Baron-Reid. Click to enlarge the image. 

The Empress is the embodiment of creation and fertility. With my child-bearing all done, this definitely relates to new ideas and experiences. The affirmation for the Empress (as written in the deck guidebook) starts with the following: 
This is a wonderful time to give birth to new ideas and experiences. Nourishment is assured as I step into a new version of myself. My life is rich and ripe with possibility that I can manifest and create.  
As I said, it's no surprise that this card came up. A couple of my design commissions are due to be published in the next week and as a result, my thoughts have turned to new projects and where I should direct my energy next. I haven't been entirely sure about the direction I want to take, and this has been reflected in almost all of my daily readings for the last week. In fact it's one of the reasons I came back to these exercises. The Empress is a reassuring card - I haven't felt very creative lately, but the seeds of many new ideas are inside my head and my notebook, they just need some attention and nurturing to bring them to life.

The Messenger of Water (the equivalent of the 'emo' Knight of Cups in a traditional deck) is the wild card. This is the card of heightened emotional awareness, romantic feelings, and seeing the best in others. There are a few affirmations to accompany this card but this one speaks to me the most: 
I need to look for the best in others and honour it, even when it seems a challenge to do so. 
It's interesting that the messenger herself is looking at a seahorse. These little creatures have a lot of symbolic meaning, including perseverance / staying anchored (they use their tails to anchor themselves in place when the sea is rough), looking from the perspective of both genders (the male is impregnated by the female) and putting up a protective barrier (they have a tough exoskeleton). There are several pertinent messages for me in this!

The Hermit is the card that perfectly embodies my feelings today - it so happens that I also listened to a short 'Tarot Bytes' podcast about it on my morning walk! This card is about taking time out - it's the need for solitude and peace to get your thoughts in order and to gain a better perspective on the situation. 

It's timely, as I haven't been on my own for MONTHS. My husband and I both work from home, and it's also been the school holidays so the children were recently with us 24/7 for over a fortnight. As much as I love to be with my family, I REALLY need time out to recharge, to be alone and in silence. If you're empathic, you'll understand why this is essential for me - it's why I prefer to walk the dog alone in the mornings, and why I have my own little studio space at home (to escape to).

Today my husband has taken the kids out for a few hours. Aside from a far-off lawnmower, the only noise is the dog's light snoring and the tapping of my fingers on the keyboard. My (lovely) mother asked if I'd like to do something with her today, but I had to decline - I just have to be alone for a few hours. Part of the affirmation for this card sums it up:
When I step back, retreat, regroup, and renew, I have a clear perspective on everything in my life.
So overall, my take-away message about the things that want to come forward in me right now are: nurturing my creativity and bringing my ideas to life, being more tolerant and understanding (my husband will be pleased!), and taking some time out to make sense of everything. As the Hermit shows, the door is right there waiting to be unlocked.  All of the keys are there too - it's just a case of trying them to find out which is needed to open it. 

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*If you're interested in taking the Vision Seeker ecourse, you can find all of the details on Nicole Piar's website, there are also lots of photos on Instagram, tagged with #VisionSeeker2017

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